Student's life

The end of summer. Your luggage is packed, your mother is crying, knowing that she is losing her offspring forever. What is wrong? Are you being sent down to do time?
Or perhaps you have to join the army to fight a war? Not quite so. You are on the way to university.
When you reach university, first of all try to make the adaptation period as long
as possible. Take part in student life. If somebody invites you to a party you are under no circumstances allowed to refuse it. It may be a little perilous for your health, and you may feel even a little sick the day after the celebration, but remember – duty always comes first (excluding those chores, however, which are wearisome, involve work, etc.)
When the academic year is in full swing, try to show yourself. At the lectures, always sit in the first row to make yourself visible to the lecturers. They must get to be familiar with your face – in a few weeks time they will be given no chance to do so. Keep in mind that
a lecture is not the finest place for playing cards, Russian roulette, or other gambling games – though you can make some money on it, there is a risk of being detected by your professor.
Do not panic when the days of exams, tests and other humiliating activities are about to begin. During written exams, do not look at your white sheet of paper, waiting for a divine invention. A strong beliefe in God is geat, but remember that he might be too busy to notice you on that particular day. At last, when a bright idea has crossed your mind, do nevery to put everything on paper within seconds. There will be somebody checking this paper who might prove to be not that good at deciphering hieroglyphics.
When entering the room where the oral examinations are taking place, refrain from shouting “Professor Jenkinson”, I didn’t know you had a beard!” (He’s had it for the last forty years), but sit peaceful and calm in the chair. The impression that this piece of furniture
is an electric one is just an illusion though from your point of view you may even be right. When your oral performance is over, smile, nod, even if the professor informs you that your case is a specific one, and you can pass this exam on condition that he will never, ever see your face again(do agree on that suggestion).
If you had a streak of good luck during the remaining exams, it means that you are free for the summer.